Isn’t
it strange that we always seem to be busy and have little time
to do what we really want to do. This song is about a crucial
moment in my life when I needed to take stock and invest
in a bit of self reflection. I wasn’t a committed Christian
at this time but I delighted in talking about God, the Bible
and the possibilities of a scientific explanation of the recorded miracles
of the Word. The debate and passing comments were for me just
a welcome distraction from the real issue of my soul. I was
dangling over hell, on course for a lost eternity and I knew
it! My life was quite complicated, being a young person;
part of a dysfunctional family that was on the verge of breaking
up and subsequently did.
However, I thought I was smart enough to sort out my problems
and neglecting that nagging feeling that Jesus might actually
be the answer after all, gave me a sense of control, even
if I was veering myself off course. Donald was a little older
than me and had been laying on the Gospel big time all night
and I’d just been giving it back, but this time I wasn’t enjoying
it the way I usually did. Conviction was looming over me
and I was just about to call it a night to get out of the
line of fire… then the crucial moment came.
I didn’t realise it, but the Lord knew I needed five minutes;
yes, just five minutes to churn over this heavy conversation
that I’d just had in my mind… by myself! Donald was summoned
away and even he looked a bit bewildered by what was happening.
I think he thought that he was loosing a great opportunity to “get
me saved” and into the Kingdom.
His hopes dashed, the spirit stifled, he excused himself and left
me and God alone. This ‘space’ became a time of reflection
for me, where I could begin to evaluate what I wanted out
of life, where I could size up all the things I’d heard about
Jesus and by the end of it, I knew that I needed Him. “He (God)
planned this!” I thought, and it was there that I invited Jesus
into my life, asking Him to forgive me a sinner. Immediately
a burden left me, I experienced an incredible sense of knowing
that I was not alone and that all things had become new.
The Lord seemed to transcend every thought I had, every objection;
this was what I really wanted. I had to stop… to appreciate this.
Perhaps you have been caught up with little time to take God seriously;
your life and your thoughts are cluttered with the ongoing,
unrelenting business of life an d the perpetual narrative
of excuses in your head. I recommend that you stop right
now, take a break and change to programme for a time of reflection.
I found Him there… waiting patiently for me to be still, that
I might discover Him.
BL